Things I Wish to Convey to My (Nonexistent) Potential Male Suitors7:47:00 PM
- I get scared by Scooby Doo
- Dating me means agreeing to be my "Instagram Husband"
- Literally I will never love you more than Fonzie (my cat, but this also probably applies to Henry Winkler's character in Happy Days)
- Take me to Disneyland, or else
- Please wear socks always because feet are gross
- I am honestly always tired. Not exaggerating. Let's just nap at home. Always always always
- Buy me French fries
- I'm only interested in going on dates, not hanging out
- I am going to post pictures of us on social media, and you better put me in your profile picture too
- You are allowed to buy me tickets to see Taylor Swift live, just make sure you don't come with me or I will leave you because I am so in love with her
- Speaking of Taylor Swift, "I get drunk on jealousy," so don't tell me about your exes, even if I ask
- I know I'm cute (self-love club), but you better still remind me a lot
- My love language is food
- I literally made an Instagram for my cat and his favorite movie is Ratatouille
- If we go out, just automatically assume that I want Cafe Rio
- I'm probably not gonna wear makeup for you, so don't get your hopes up
- I want to be fun and cute but mostly I'm sad and sleepy
- I am guaranteed to spill food on my clothes daily
- I want you to play with my hair but also my hair gets too tangled to play with????
Aren't you just dying to date me now?