10 Days

April 25, 2018

To put things in scientific terms, I have approximately way too many emotions running through my every atom right now.
I am getting married in 10 days. That in and of itself can be enough to paralyze someone with stress, excitement, and both happy and sad crying. Enter me, stage left.
I have these thoughts that push through to center stage constantly saying, "You're getting married and your dad isn't going to be there." They tell me, "You know that your sister would never want to wear a pink bridesmaid dress." I'm marrying someone that Julian never even met. I'm marrying someone that my father met only briefly (but I'm grateful that he even got that). Also, what on earth, I'm going to be someone's wife?
My best friend that I have only seen twice in the past ten years is flying in for the wedding. Three hometown best friends are coming up as well. I am so excited just to see them! I want to cry thinking about the selfies we'll take and how I'll get to see all of my favorite people hanging out together because yeah, they just love me a lot.
Did I mention that I also started a new job a week ago? I am transitioning from two part-time jobs to one full-time job. I left the best place that I have ever worked at with some of the best people that I have ever worked with (and I had to turn in the nice work computer that they had given me). I am learning the ropes in a new position for a new department, and to top it off, I have to be at work at 8:00 AM every day. I am not a morning person (to be fair, I'm not a night person either, I'm more of just an "always tired" person). I guess I have to people that I really live in Utah now.
The Sodalicious at UVU is closing for the summer and I have somehow managed to get myself slightly dependent on the caffeine one finds in a coconut lime Dr. Pepper in the past few weeks.
Also my washing machine is broken and I'm too stubborn to go to a laundromat, so yeah, I'm going to ignore the clothes that are piling up. And don't forget, I'm on this new wedding diet where I don't lose weight, I just gain it, because I like cheesecake more than I like "looking good" and not eating bread.

But heeeeeeeeeeello, I am marrying my best friend. I get to love him for forever. We'll get to have sleepovers. We'll get to raise children. He'll let me stop at The Cheesecake Factory when we're anywhere remotely near Salt Lake. We will spend way too much time watching movies and I'll try not to watch our TV shows without him. We'll take our weekly Sunday longboard rides (because who needs Sunday walks?) and laugh at each other. We will love each other more and more every day. We'll forget to water our succulents and eat too much (not enough) cheese.
Sometimes my life seems so stressful and hard and confusing, but if there's something I'm sure about through all of these changes, it's that I want to be with Jamison. And in ten days, we will be husband and wife, so I hope you're excited for me to instagram pictures of us for the rest of our lives.

Yours truly,
McKay

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