I Love Him Even More Now

October 16, 2018


You always hear people say how, after getting married, they love their spouse even more now. I always assumed this was codswallop (I really wanted to use that word) -- on our wedding day, my whole heart was bursting with love and adoration for Jamison (and exploding out of my eyeballs in the form of tears), and I couldn't imagine feeling any stronger toward him than I was feeling then.
We have been married almost six months now, and I can officially confirm that 1) the man flu is real and 2) I do love my husband even more now! Although being married hasn't felt that different than when we were engaged (or even dating), our relationship has changed. I'm not sure that I can even put it into adequate words, but in the few short months post-nuptials, my heart has had to "stretch" in order to accommodate the deepening love that I have for Jamison.
I'm not saying that marriage has been a walk in the park because it's been weird adjusting to living with another boy. (I think that means we need to get a girl cat? A girl dog? A girl llama, maybe?) I don't like sharing my bed with Jamison, because I already have to share it with Fonzie, and that does not leave me adequate room. Now that the days are shorter and the sun rises later, there is no light peeking through the windows when I get up in the morning for work. I have to lay out my clothes the night beforehand -- which doesn't work well if you're as indecisive with outfits as I am -- and stumble around in the dark because my husband is still asleep. I think I've gotten three bruises this week alone from running into my nightstand or dresser. There are twice as many dishes and we go through food twice as fast. There are a lot of...well, not hard parts, but annoying parts of being a newlywed, but I think those difficulties are some of the reason that our love has grown.
Nearly every night, I make dinner for us. Not because I'm a woman and I "have" to, but because I get home from work earlier. I have time to grocery shop. I can make food in time for us to eat together as soon as he's home for the night. It's a way for me to show my love to him. And most importantly: I get to decide what we eat, according to my appetite. 😉 It's weird watching myself grow up like this. I'm a wife? I still feel like an awkward 14-year-old, trying to impress people with my knowledge of Harry Potter and literally running away from boys that I liked. And now I'm married to the boy that I like most of all! Love -- and marriage -- is truly an adventure.
I'm sure there will be plenty of hardships in our marriage -- as those (unfortunately) come along with everything in life -- but if the last half year has shown me anything, it's that my love will only grow. For Jamison, for the blessing of marriage, for God, for Fonzie, and for nachos. I love being half of Team Jamison x McKay, and I can't wait to continue to learn and grow in this life with my best friend.

Yours truly,
McKay

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